Happy Family
by kei-v3
Summary: A collection of drabbles featuring the family life of Haruto and L-elf with their son in the peaceful AU. Might be related to each other/other fics, or independent drabbles on their own. Mpreg, possess inconsistent details in every drabble, HaruEru.
1. Piggyback

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Valvrave. Ew. Don't put my name side to side with the anime which has that shitty ending

_A/N: Yeah I still love VVV but I'm fucking disappointed in that ending. But we do get the HaruEru vibes hnnnngh so I still, ultimately, love it. Anyway. Ending means reasons for being delusional~ So here we go, a drabble collection of working-age!AU in which Haruto and L-elf are married and implied Mpreg. So if you don't like the theme, don't read it! *hearts*_

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ハルエル

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"Anybody home?"

Haruto peeked inside the living room of the house he shared with his spouse and son, but didn't receive any welcoming reply. "Ouji? Eru?" he asked, while loosening his tie. "Are you guys… whoa. Oh hi, Ouji." He found his pouting son before him. Several times calling his name still didn't make his son responding to him, and Haruto sighed. This was Sunday morning, and he had promised to come back Saturday evening, but the train was late due to heavy snow. He looked up to the master bedroom, looking at light peeking through the crack of the door.

"Dad isn't tired at all, so do you want to go to Disneyland today?" he asked, trying to bribe his son even though he really was actually exhausted. "Oh, Ouji… Dad couldn't stand you being mad at him…" he glomped and hugged his son. His bag was all forgotten, lying on the floor.

"Come on, it's been a while so let's piggyback!" he lifted Ouji and nudged the small child onto his own back. Ouji yelped and couldn't help but to laugh at the gesture, and Haruto was glad. "Do you want to ride to the bedroom, checking how your mother's doing?" He smiled. He hoped Eru would forgive him for being late. His spouse was scary as hell when he was mad. An apologetic intimate moment would be necessary later on, because Haruto missed him too.

Letting Ouji knocked the door for him, Haruto lovingly said towards the door, hoping his voice reached beyond the wooden plate and straight to the person he loved most in the world.

"Eru? I'm home."


	2. a kiss, a tie, a promise of goodbye

_A/N: Angst-wreck story. I'm sorry for the different detail with the first drabble. Originally from a prompt in tokisemeharuto. Hope you enjoy the ride? :'D _

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ハルエル

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"_Mou_… Dad, what are you doing?"

Haruto turned around as soon as he heard that voice, looking at his son who was crossing arms in the doorway now, pout adorned his face. Haruto grinned sheepishly, looking at the mess in the kitchen just for trying to boil some water. Boil water. He didn't even know why he needed that given he had dispenser and coffee maker and all. And then he had been turning on the stove but forgot to put on the pan, and his tie loosely hung against the fire, and it triggered the extinguisher they had in their house.

"I'm sorry, Ouji, I don't seem to be in my right mind lately," he replied, opening his arms complete with the drenched shirts and everything, and just as cued, Ouji stepped to his embrace. Haruto squeezed his child, who was protesting the wet clothes but didn't struggle against him.

His son, who was now snorting at him. Who had grown to become more and more alike with his mother lately. "But are you OK, Dad?" he asked with more concern. Even the layered attention was that of his mother.

"Yup, I'm OK. Sorry to make you worry, Ouji. Go back to your studies, or your mother's gonna get mad," he patted Ouji's head.

"Okay…" Haruto watched as Ouji glanced back from the doorway then disappeared to the corridor. Really, he looked like L-elf so much lately.

But from what his spouse told him last time they were eating out together, it seemed Ouji had been juggling personalities; looking like him when with his mother, and looking like his mother when with him. Or was it just the way married partners tended to see their spouse's features in their child? Haruto chuckled, maybe for him it was, but he doubted it was L-elf's case. He had been in this one-sided love for his wife for the longest time, and despite the motherly (and fatherly) care L-elf showed to Ouji, Haruto always felt like he was tagging along the journey. Sure, Ouji was conceived just from that one night, which was the cause of his marriage proposal to L-elf, and at that time, he was very ecstatic.

Now, the fact that someone he loved didn't love him back was breaking his heart every single day.

Rukino Saki, the celebrity he was handling right now for the Beast High advertisement, was now making bold moves against him, so much that Inuzuka-senpai started making dirty jokes and prompts to cheat on his own family because Rukino-san had clearly made statements that she was OK being a mistress. The bleak comparison with how cold L-elf acted around him when Ouji wasn't around was enough to make his loyalty swaying. Rukino-san was beautiful, proud and amazing, but when she was alone with Haruto, she looked so fragile, on the verge of tears several times, and Haruto had embraced her at those instances. Warm, deep hug which healed himself, because it was good to feel that your actions affected someone dearly.

He sighed, hadn't gone back up even after the hug with his son. This afternoon, before coming home, was the last day of video shooting session of the commercial. Rukino-san had called him to her changing room. Haruto really should have more self-awareness, but he hadn't. He shouldn't be surprised when Rukino-san had waited for him stripped to her underwear. Haruto had gulped then, admiring the mesmerizing beauty in front of him. What sane man wouldn't? It had been years since the last time he had sex.

Christmas five years ago, when he was too drunk to hold back, and L-elf was so adorable, but was so pained and flinched and too aware of Haruto when they did it. And when in the morning Haruto tried to convey how much he loved L-elf, through words and actions and everything his whole being could ask for, L-elf refused to look at him. "I love you," he had said then, but L-elf's body had only gone more rigid. "Do you love me even just for a little?" he had asked in the last desperate attempt to break into his spouse's privacy.

L-elf had said "I don't", then.

And for years, Haruto hadn't been alone with L-elf without Ouji around. Years of feeling like a school boy all over again, of glimpsing, of holding back his desires. Just a smile could set his heart aflutter, but the rejection would replay itself over and over again, and it was getting harder and harder to hide the face of a broken heart before his family. So he chose to work harder, getting home later, or even not going home for days.

But even those still didn't make him unfaithful, it seemed. The collarbone was different, the neckline was different, the scent was different. Rukino-san wasn't L-elf, and even when closing his eyes as he was being kissed, it felt wrong. And even when he kissed her back, it was breaking his heart even more. And Rukino-san knew it, he had told her about the relationship with his "wife". What he hadn't told her in words was how much he loved L-elf, and the fact that L-elf, as unhappy in this marriage as he seemed to be, never once cheated on Haruto. Haruto wouldn't start doing it before L-elf. So he said no to Rukino-san this afternoon, and apologizing repeatedly, and Rukino-san tried to cover her broken heart with an unaffected attitude, but Haruto could see her eyes, which looked too similar to his own eyes in the mirror whenever he came home. He hugged her, covered her body with his coat which was half undressed anyway. Anymore words would hurt them both, so Haruto simply put on a strong face and walked for the door without turning back.

But how silly that as soon as he got out of everyone's sight, he became too dazed to even realize that his tie was on fire.

Haruto huffed, finally took off the tie which was L-elf's last birthday gift five years ago, and grazed his thumb fondly. His head hung down low, and that was why he didn't suspect anything as he walked out of the kitchen.

But L-elf was there, in the corridor, and just like the years when he was a school boy, his heart stopped at that sight, he forgot how to breathe. This was too silly. Despite his youthful look, he wasn't young anymore.

L-elf's violet gaze turned upon the blue-white tie in his grasp, where the burnt edge was really visible. "…the tie," was the word L-elf said, and it surprised Haruto that his spouse even initiated the conversation.

"Yeah," he smiled, and it felt so bittersweet yet suffocating at the same time. "The tie."

L-elf frowned but he turned back and entered his working room again. A soft thud resounded in the room as he closed the door. Closing himself against Haruto, who felt his eyes burned with hot liquid. He couldn't turn away from this family, not with Ouji around, not when just a short word could make his heart leaped boundlessly, even though it crashed to the ground painfully just in the next second.

Maybe the time to end it all had come close.

If, and Haruto cringed just thinking the possibility, if L-elf found someone else to be happy with… At that time, Haruto surely would… He would-

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ハルエル

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_A/N: Don't worry, the abrupt ending was intentional. Please wait a while before I could get to the second part. _


	3. it's neither a lie nor a goodbye

_A/N: Sorry it took me so long! I had difficulties in determining the progress, but here you go. This drabble(?) is a direct sequel to "A kiss, a tie, a promise of goodbye". If there's a grammar or typo, please forgive me. Also thank you for all the reviews, faves, and follows to any of my stories. Guys I love you. _

_Special thanks to __**Gwynhafra86**__ for your Mpreg HaruEru fic! I need a companion in this ship, really! This chapter comes so much easier after reading your latest chapter. *laughs* (and pssst readers, it was set in canon. And Mpreg. And multichaptered. I practically bow down and slather all my love to her fic, seriously.) _

_Also thank you for __**azab**__'s prompt. I love kicks in the butt to finish my fics. (Though to be honest, your name is scary for me... I'm sure my fellow Indonesian readers could notice what made me so scared, hahaha.*feels so sinful* )_

_Anyway. January 11th was HaruEru day. Woohoo, my tumblr got a healthy dose of people celebrating it. My new prof pic (which's also my fic's pictures) was the art I made for the day, haha. I wanted to write this fic in time too, but uhhhh... weeell. Art bunnies won over plot bunnies that day. Anyway, please enjoy!_

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ハルエル

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Midnight. Haruto was just getting out of the shower when the doorbell rang. It wasn't loud, it was sort of too soft, even. He wondered who could have rang it. Did Senpai or Yamada-kun decide to crash on his house because there was no train until morning? It had happened a few times before. But Haruto was only cladded in a towel. He went to the bedroom to change, hoping the guest would be patient, yet the doorbell rang again. Hurriedly wearing the first thing he found, a T-shirt and blue shorts, his heart skipped a beat as he heard someone opened their house's door. "Yes? Who are you?" It was L-elf's voice.

Standing before L-elf, just in front of the _genkan_, was a girl. Her hair was long, it was midnight but her eyes were covered in sunglasses. Knowing his spouse's line of work, L-elf predicted correctly that this was some talent that he was working with.

But what was this dreaded feeling that clutched at his innards as he looked at her?

L-elf was about to repeat his question when she took off her sunglasses and smiled. "I'm Rukino Saki. You must be the "wife"," she said. L-elf realized she had been holding a coat, and the dreaded feeling clutched him stronger than before. Her words, that coat, this hour. Could it be—"I came to return this. Is Haruto still awake?" she asked. First name basis. L-elf felt his vision blackened. His prediction could not be wrong, not after the hints were so blatantly shared before his eyes.

"Rukino-san!" Haruto just came from his room. His hair was still very damp, and the aromatic shampoo the whole family used was spreading in the air. His blue eyes shifted uncomfortably to his spouse, and back to the celebrity he was working with for that commercial, and he pushed her outside, giving apologetic look towards L-elf as he closed the door. It felt like blood had been drained from his face, completely. From how pale he felt, maybe it had.

Haruto shifted back his attention towards Rukino-san, whom he was still nudging to go further away from the door. He urgently whispered, "What are you doing here, Rukino-san?"

She smiled bitterly. "Well, I can only go to someone's place when it is really late so that people won't follow me around. You knew that."

Haruto bit his bottom lip, removing his hands from Rukino-san, and asked, "Where did you know my address from?"

"From your senpai. Don't worry, Haruto. I'm here only to return this," she said, lifting the coat and put it into Haruto's arms. "As well as a gamble."

"Gamble?"

"I love you. I had made it pretty clear. But you have rejected me pretty clearly as well. If by coming here I could help you fix something here..." she trailed off, Haruto's eyes widened in realization of what she could have possibly meant. "No, I'm not that good of a person. I hope you'll know when to give up and get a divorce and I can get you all for myself," she said. There was steel in her words, but when Haruto looked up to say something, he saw her glistening eyes, quivering lips, and trembling hands. It was a beautiful sight, and before, Haruto had taken her to his arms, comforting her in a silent hug. But not now. Haruto steeled his own body, rigid at the sight, and she noticed a rejection when she saw one.

Haruto was surprised when there was a hint of wetness in his cheek, as Rukino-san leaned forward to give him a peck. "Rukino-san...!"

"Like I said, a gamble. If it goes to my favor, you know where to reach me." And with those words, she put on her sunglasses and turned away, never looking back as she reached her car.

Haruto felt the cold night air blowing his damp hair, and he shivered slightly from the wind. There was a lot of things to think about, and he was already half lost in thought when he stepped inside the house. He bit back his gasp when he realized that L-elf was sitting in the living room. L-elf never did that. When he had finished his business outside, he always went back to his own room, because Ouji wasn't awake at nights and he never had any business with Haruto.

It was necessary to pass through the living room to get upstairs, so Haruto braced himself and stepped inside. His coat was cold against his hand, had Rukino-san stayed outside for a while before ringing the doorbell?

L-elf couldn't believe he sat there himself. Half of it came from the necessity to address this matter. The other half came from the shock. He knew he needed to sit down before his legs giving out their strength. He held back the temptation to peek and listen into the conversation that his spouse and that woman might be having, but he decided it would probably too much. What if they were not just talking? Would his spouse dare to do that?

He felt his toes went cold as the front door opened again, and his spouse was passing through the room where he was sitting on, as if nothing out of ordinary had just happened right now. How could he walk as if it was nothing? Did his spouse already stop caring about his opinion? L-elf quickly found his voice, and asked, "...Are you having a relationship with her?"

Haruto gasped as he heard that question, stopping his feet from going across the room. Right. Of course L-elf would think that way. Was this the limit, then? Haruto gazed longingly towards his wife and changed his walking course towards the couches instead. Would it matter to L-elf whether or not he was in a relationship with Rukino-san? For a slight of a very painful hope, he wished it did matter for L-elf. Haruto sat down on the smaller couch and tilted his body so he was facing L-elf, and answered, "No, I'm not."

L-elf sighed. His mind was clouded right now, and he couldn't figure out whether that was a lie or truth. But at the very least, Haruto was addressing this issue instead of letting it pass like it was a normal occurence in their lives, which it most certainly not. L-elf felt shivering in cold. He wished Ouji was awake right now, so L-elf could hug the son that he gave birth to. Assurance that whatever happened, he still had someone to be by his side. "So that is really your coat," he made a statement, glad that he could keep his voice level.

For Haruto, the calmness stabbed him. The faint hope flickered away, almost dying. Even if just for the sake of keeping this family together, Haruto didn't care. If L-elf still needed him in some kind of way, he didn't care about the reason, no matter how it was killing him slowly inside. "Yes," he inhaled. It slightly quivered. "I lent it to her earlier..." he couldn't help but to trail off, recalling the event which required him to lend his coat. The indecent sight, the temptation of having an affair.

_But would she come here personally if you simply lent it to her?_, L-elf thought. In his mind, the answer would be no. She was pretty, at their age, famous (he had recognized the face as she took off the glasses). And L-elf had seen the way she looked at his spouse earlier. The sound of her voice as he called him "Haruto", as if gently caressing the man whose name she was calling. It couldn't be something casual for her. L-elf didn't dare assessing how Haruto had reached to her first when he came by the door and ignoring him, how the door had been closed right in front of his nose, or how nonchalantly he regarded this matter before L-elf made an effort to say something about it. L-el f wouldn't dare reaching into a dreaded conclusion. Or was that conclusion already too long overdue?

Five years. For five years, his spouse had been distancing himself from L-elf. He seemed to be close with Ouji, but had they even talked together this past five years, when Ouji wasn't around? He could not remember talking to Haruto except about family holiday, or the house's bill. L-elf only knew about the promotion at work from his Senpai and friends who visited their house on a New Year's visit. They never shared a bedroom even since the beginning of this marriage, they never went through a honeymoon phase as Ouji was already conceived in L-elf's belly. But for these past five years, not once did Haruto ever touch him again. Long nights where he must be awake was the most excruciating nights. Haruto had avoided coming back home early. He even avoided coming back home altogether at most weeks. He passed their birthdays several times working overtime, only making time for Ouji's birthdays, and L-elf had begun to be suspicious. Perhaps Haruto didn't want him anymore. And now, their house was visited by a beautiful woman whom any man would feel lucky to be involved with.

"...Do you want to be with her?" L-elf asked again, and he could see his spouse went even paler than before. His mouth felt bitter. Had he hit the truth? "We... probably should... file a divorce." L-elf couldn't believe such words went out from his mouth, but it had, and there was no swallowing back. It just was not possible to take those words back.

_Ah, so this is the last moment, isn't it?_ Haruto thought numbly. "Ouji is ten years old too, he's grown up..." It probably wouldn't be so damaging for him, no more than being trapped with parents who could no longer maintain a relationship betwen them.

It hurt. His chest felt like being stabbed by needles that destroyed his lungs when Haruto brought Ouji into this talk, as if it was something final for them. "So..." His breaths wavered. He couldn't afford that, no. He was the level-headed one in the family. "So you've been thinking about it a lot, is that what you're saying?" he asked. To his horror, his eyes felt stinging heat. Had his hormones become that of a woman after he conceived Ouji? He didn't remember ever crying over something this trivial before he was married. _Trivial? _He wanted to laugh hysterically. No, this wasn't something trivial for him. This was his life. This marriage, this family was practically everything he had. L-elf had no close friends to confide in, no parents to get shelter, no siblings to share with. This was everything that mattered in his life.

Where had it gone wrong? It took him so, so long to finally admit to himself that he was, indeed, in love with his spouse. He was usually precise with his time, but when it was regarding feelings, everything was really vague. It was when Haruto smiled at Ouji, and Ouji hugged his father with love and pride, L-elf finally could think that life had been good, would only get better from then onwards. He could finally believe that baseless assumption.

But when he didn't realize, Haruto began slipping away. L-elf couldn't do anything about it; he had no right to start begging Haruto to look at him. He knew he had been acting horribly as a spouse. Not even once had he replied Haruto's confession with an "I love you" from his own mouth. He had taken his spouse's feelings as granted, and now it was his punishment. However, he had made peace with himself, determined to reply Haruto back the very next time his husband gave him that chance.

The chance never came.

"Your tie..." L-elf trailed off, not knowing his own reason to mention that. Probably because it was the last present he managed to give to his spouse. To burn it like that earlier—L-elf knew it was merely an accident, but to his already less-than-confident mind, it seemed like Haruto didn't care about the relationship anymore, as much as he didn't care for the tie.

"...it's your last present," Haruto said bitterly. He didn't know why L-elf brought that up; for him, it was a painful reminder of their relationship, on the verge of ending. If it ever existed in the first place. The timing was also perfect; just when he found his tie burned, his life came to an abrupt ending in the same evening. He had absentmindedly wore the tie almost everyday, hoping L-elf would notice, hoping—what was it that he was hoping for? That it would save their marriage? That sounded ridiculous even to his clouded mind, but even so... Could he ask? Could he beg for this not to end? Could he use Ouji as a reason, even though Ouji was already grown, just as he said? "About this family... are you sure?" he nervously gulped down, feeling cold and numb at the same time, the room heater had no effect to his wet hair, it seemed.

L-elf smiled bitterly. So Haruto knew it was his last present 5 years 3 months ago. Did he nonchalantly let it burn knowing that too? "Our separation? Well, I'm—"

"No!"

Both Haruto and L-elf turned to the stairs, where their son climbed down. He looked wobbly, as if just waking up, his voice was coarse, but his expression was on the verge of tears. Tears that neither of his parents seemed to be able to let out, right now, no matter how crushed their hearts currently felt.

"Ouji? You're not sleeping?" Haruto asked, wanting to support his son, but Ouji was quicker than he thought, came hugging his mother as soon as he got to the couches. Haruto stopped midway and awkwardly returned to his seat.

"No... I—I heard doorbell, and I want to pee, and then suddenly you two are talking about divorce, and I..." Ouji was panicking, almost hyperventilating. L-elf hugged his son, receiving more comfort than what he could give from that gesture, softly running his hand through their similar hairs.

Ah, those two people that Haruto loved most, that he would give the world into. If they were divorced, could he get the custody of Ouji? Probably not. At this moment, it was obvious who Ouji would choose if it came to that. He wouldn't let himself and L-elf stood in the opposite sides of the court no matter what. In the end, Haruto could only get a visit on weekends, at most.

The thought broke him. Haruto sobbing to his palm, his body raking with grief. This wasn't a sight he wanted his family to see. "I love you, Ouji..." he said, managing not to let his sobs interfere the words.

"I love you too, Dad!" Ouji said to him, powerfully. Haruto found small consolation in that. He could live knowing his son loved him, and really, wouldn't that be the best knowledge a father could die with? "And I love you too, Mom..." Haruto looked up in time to see Ouji say that to L-elf, and the two silver-haired males seemed so content in each other's hugs like that. "Please, don't say you're going to separate..."

L-elf was brokenhearted with the sight of his son, begging him like that. He squeezed Ouji tighter, murmuring, "I love you, Ouji... Everything is going to be alright." L-elf hummed, letting he immersed himself in the reassuring words, even though he didn't quite believe in that sentence. Probably only by adding "in the end", it would come true. "Come on, I will take you to your room, okay?" He lifted Ouji with ease, his muscles weren't that underdeveloped even after the marriage. He couldn't bear to look at Haruto, so he turned to the stairs without even a peek.

Ouji helped by turning the knob to his room, his quiet sobs had became calmer hiccups. L-elf brushed his hair away from his forehead, reminded of how messy Haruto's head in bed as well, and looked to the big blue, clear orbs that he and his father shared. He would survive if he could always be with Ouji. At least that way, he would see the proof of family he once had.

"Ne, Mom," Ouji whispered to him.

"Yes?" L-elf said as he tucked his son into the blanket.

"I love you and Dad. You and Dad also love me. But how about... you two?" Ouji asked. "Do you love Dad?"

L-elf was speechless. He didn't know if he could answer that question, if he could put his feelings into words, letting it out to the world, even though his world only consisted of his son, right now. "Mom..." Ouji whispered again, calling him, waiting for an answer. That sounded almost like a scolding to his ears. Almost as if his mind scolded him for being unable to form an honest answer.

"...Yes, Ouji." L-elf kissed Ouji's forehead and sat up, watching his son breathing softly. "Yes, I love your father." There. His breath was shaken as soon as his long-held confession was out. It wasn't that hard to admit, now that it was a simple fact. It hurt, though. The tie, the guest, Haruto's words. His feelings didn't matter anymore that now it had come to this, did it? But Ouji didn't need to know that. He just needed the truth of L-elf's feelings, as he was smiling against the cover of his bed, looking more content than a minute ago. L-elf wished he could feel the same. "Sweet dreams, Ouji."

Ouji hummed softly, and L-elf finally managed to smile. But the second he could smile, was the second the air felt too suffocating. "...kuh." He took a look at Ouji, feeling relieved his closing eyes didn't open. Taking a last look, he walked away from his son, opening the door that had been automatically closed behind them earlier. Painful, every step was painful. He almost didn't realize how light the handle was, as if it wasn't closed properly. When he took a look to his right, there was Haruto outside. It was an understatement to say he was surprised, as his brain was refusing to work right at that second. The words he said to his son... did Haruto hear that?

"I don't-" Haruto began speaking. He had gone upstairs following his spouse and son, silently. He wanted to saw them. It could be the last time he could ever see them in a peaceful manner. His heart stopped when he listened into the conversation; he didn't even know how their voices could reach his ears. Thousands of feelings entered his mind, but "I don't care—"

L-elf gasped. Haruto had heard, but... "You don't care?" he snapped. _It hurt, Haruto_. "Then pretend you didn't hear anything," he said every word seethingly. His words were dipped in poisons, his stare was that of a thousand daggers. He hoped it would seem like that to Haruto, because he couldn't bring himself to walk to the kitchen and return with a knife to literally stab his spouse. Haruto was in the way between him and the stairs, afterall. L-elf decided to turn around and return to his room, but as he did just that, Haruto gripped his arm and forced him to look at his spouse.

"Why?" Haruto asked, glaring. He was angry. Angry because he couldn't take it anymore. L-elf could yank his arm away, but Haruto gripped tighter, until his own fingers hurt to grip against bones or a mass of manly muscles. "Is it because it's a lie? Was it just a lie you said to calm down Ouji?" he asked and the thought broke him further. This day-to-day hell, when would it end? And even so, he still preferred to have this hell than not having his family at all.

That moment when Haruto's face broke down, L-elf felt something he hadn't felt in years. Hope. But he still yanked his arm when the grip loosened. His arm was pulsating hotly; the grip would leave marks. L-elf blushed at the thought and felt frustrated at himself for liking the fact that his spouse left a mark on him. He didn't know he could be this desperate. "And... and if it is?" he tested. Inwardly, L-elf groaned. Why couldn't he be honest just like with Ouji?

Haruto was shocked at the loss of contact as soon as L-elf yanked his hand. Still, he walked slightly away, not wanting their words to immediately be heard by Ouji. L-elf followed him; even as uncaring his spouse was, L-elf could still read Haruto's movements perfectly. "Didn't you hear me?" Haruto asked desperately. "I don't care. I don't care if it's a lie. If just a little of that is true, even if you just said that to calm down our son, please don't wish to get a divorce."

_Our son._ Haruto had said that with such possessiveness. L-elf wondered if the same feelings could still be applied to himself as well. It used to be, once in the past when Haruto had asked for blessings to his friends because that was as close as L-elf got to a group of close people, ten years and seven months ago. And now he was remembering all the "good" times. Just how far had this marriage changed him? He never recalled having such thoughs. He would know, since he had been keeping journals until his thoughts began being replaced with feelings and it was embarrassing to be written down, around five years ago.

L-elf forced himself to return to current time. Haruto said that. So it was what Haruto had meant when he said he didn't care? "But isn't that what you want?" he asked unsurely. He loathed himself for being like meek and defenseless, but to his defense, right now it was a moment he had to thread carefully. Everything had to be cleared out. He couldn't bear having doubts after doubts.

"NO—" Haruto almost yelled out the word when he saw Ouji's door sign with his name in colorful crayon letters that he had made repeatedly once he could write. "...no. I never want to get divorced with you. I don't want to get separated with this family. I would never."

"That girl—"

"—is a colleague. I had made that clear with her today. I had made it clear again just now. L-elf, I never touched her." _Not in the way I wish I could touch you_, he thought sadly as he threw his face away from his spouse. At least by this conversation, perhaps this meant L-elf had changed his mind. Perhaps this meant his world wasn't ending right now. Perhaps he could still live on day to day. As hellish as it was, he could still wish for the chances to arrive unlike the irrevocable position if they were to be divorced. He would try, once again. He would try telling L-elf that he loved him. Even such lie could make his heart floating to the sky, soaring high. Just hearing L-elf affirming the question. Just one word, and it made every bit of pain worth it. Even if it was such a cruel, cruel lie. Even if he became so much more greedier and would do anything to make L-elf confirm that again. Lie to him again, Haruto didn't care if it was such a sweet lie. If spoken very often, perhaps it would someday come true.

"Then we should end this conversation," L-elf said the conclusive statement. He knew Haruto realized he was talking about the divorce as Haruto nodded. L-elf felt weak on the knees, relieved from everything. Most likely from hearing his spouse calling his name after so long. It definitely sounded firmer than how Haruto sounded in his dreams, and Haruto needed to stop that, unless he wanted L-elf to wish for more. Ah, L-elf realized he sounded like a girl in soap operas, but at this fragile moment, he made an exception from judging himself harshly.

"Thank you," Haruto said, injecting more sincere than ever to those words. He felt really grateful, and when L-elf nodded, Haruto smiled. Just once. Free from his worries, he let himself being deluded by the lie and the kind gesture. Just tonight.

It was a smile directed at him, L-elf thought. Not Ouji. Not at a joke he attempted. It was only to him. "It wasn't a lie," he said quickly, and just as abruptly, his eyes crashed close and he walked away from the scene, breathless. Closing the door to his working room and locking it in brief movements, L-elf felt like cursing himself to death. He couldn't believe what he just said. Did Haruto understand the reference? How could Haruto respond properly, if he was to run away like this? This was a sign of weakness that he couldn't afford.

But, really? Surely, tonight, this was another exception? Surely, he could still feel that Haruto would be happy instead of burdened? He could allow himself a short evening of happiness and of anxiety which was far from hurting? If it was pain, it was such a sweet, sweet pain. He could hear every beat of his heart no matter how fast they were right now. L-elf didn't dare to predict what Haruto would do, but it was time for him to be honest. At the very least, neither Haruto did wish for a divorce, nor he experienced touching that girl. In this short moment, L-elf could breathe easier.

Or he should be, once this silly heart of his could finally calm down.

Meanwhile, Haruto's brain went through a short circuit.

* * *

Tokishima family. A father, a mother (who is male), and a child. Ten years married. Haruto and L-elf's love story has only just begun.

* * *

ハルエル

* * *

_A/N: So... ahahaha, sorry about the characterization. I couldn't make a very cold L-elf, but can I be excused because this is AU afterall? I'll try making more in-character L-elf if I write him in canon universe or with legitimate angsty past, but I hope I make justice with them in this AU._

_If the format is confusing, I'm sorry for that too. Mainly, it's the effect of rereading all those ZeroKanaZero fics by __**YenGirl**__ and __**BlackenedWing**__. Of course I didn't do them justice, shh. It's my first time switching POVs inside the narratives. An experiment as well as a try in making the angst as max as possible. I love angst that comes from misunderstanding, because when it's fixed, it's usually adorable. I tried aiming for that here. Sorry if it's not realistic. I didn't try aiming for that. *laughs*_

_I still have many ideas for this AU, so this isn't marked "completed" yet. If you want to suggest what you want to see in this AU, feel free to comment! Personally I want to write when they find out L-elf is pregnant, finding a plausible cause for that one plothole (LOL), how to reconcile them both(?)... Anyway, I love love love prompts! *hearts* And reviews, of course, hehe. *hints* See you next time! I'll try making Valentine fic, but is it Valentine themed if the setting is in summer, I wonder..._


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